When I refer to the roller coaster, I am mainly talking about my emotional state. I never realized how difficult being a mommy was going to be. Nothing comes naturally- feeding, sleeping, schedules, feeding patterns- nothing.
I'll start off with the fact that I was not (and still have not been able to) produce enough milk to feed or keep up with her. It was really difficult to talk about and there is still some fear and anxiety about the fact that I have to suppliment and bottle feed her. She will not nurse and the screams she cries out when we try do not help my body's stress. (*Please note: I love and appreciate you for wanting to know how we are doing, but please do not advise me in this regard, I have spoken to lots of friends and family who have or are currently experiencing these decisions, and we have already made ours).
We started to get a somewhat consistent "routine" down and then she began her 3 week growth spurt, so everything was thrown off. When the spurt was over, she decided that she liked the shorted periods between feedings, so she took advantage of the suring the day. I can't complain too much about her sleeping, though, because she does AMAZING in the car/out and about. She also goes for long stretches at night, so PJ and I are both doing well with the amount that we sleep.
We have had our ups and downs, but I cannot say that we are without tons of love and support! I have had a few diffiult days where I don't seem to be myself, even when we're out with friends. Yet, the Lord has been faithful to remind me how much of an incredible blessing my family is. AJ is healthy, we have not had to deal with medical issues, hospital stays, medications, or any other complications. She is a good sleeper, she can't (as a newborn) sleep through the night, but she sleeps well enough to give hubby and I the sleep we need to get through the day and she rests prety well in the morning; this ideally would be a good time for me to do my Bible study and catch up on my chores.
PJ and I have a beutiful, healthy baby girl. We have a huge support around us to give us date nights and encurage us in this new adventure. We really cannot complain about this stage of life we are in. We can only pray and ask God to grant us the patience we need as new parents and the discipline we need to be intentional with our time.
Thank you for your love, encouragement and prayers! We would not be able to do this without you!
