Toddlers, Vacations, and Personal Growth

We have made it to October, which means that I missed the 1 year post for E and the 2 year post for AJ. I have no excuses, but life goes on and here we are; so let's get started.

E turned 1 year old last month and I am coming to grips with the 2 toddler thing. She is walking and jabbering and climbing and squealing! She is simply a happy kiddo whose only complaint is teething and exhaustion. I am so grateful for the way that she shows love and cuddles with me when she is sleepy. E also learns quickly and AJ is teaching her how to climb. Right now it's on my yoga block, strewn about boxes and their picnic table.

AJ is 2! I am floored by how quickly these stages are going. She tells me when she needs to poop (yeah, that's a big deal), she's in a twin bed now (which is going great at bed time - not so much with the afternoon nap), and she prefers cakes to cookies ;) She also likes pizza. AJ has such an independent spirit and loves to help PJ and I get things done. It is so humbling to see how much she knows and understands and exciting to grow as a mom teaching her how to serve others.

This weekend my mom is throwing them a Little Mermaid themed birthday party and I'm excited to take photos of the frosting all over their faces! The girls love all of their grandparents and it melts my heart to see their smiles and hear their squeals whenever they see any of them walk through the door. We all joke about how it's because, "toddlers know they can get away with a lot more when they have grands around," but I know that it is so much more than that. My girls have a beautiful bond with their grandparents and I see it in their eyes even when our parents are not around. AJ asks for them and they yearn to spend time together. It truly is precious.

As far as life goes, things have been going really well. I am at the gym 4-5 times a week. Team Training is 2-3 times and I like to swim laps on the weekends. It has been so awesome to feel the progress and see the numbers climb for personal bests. I feel more energetic and see how God is using my fitness goals to grow me in self-control, diligence, discipline and endurance. You can read more on my fitness blog, I won't take up too much space here on the family page.

PJ is doing great at work. I am so proud of his team, and I know he is too. In the past, vacation has been a headache to come back from because things have backed up and the technicians were overwhelmed without him there. Last week we were on official vacation, but he actually left work early on Friday and was gone from his store a total of 9 days. He went back to a great setup and there were no crises while he was out. I do not even remember him receiving a call but once while he was off.

God has been so faithful to soften my own heart and help me put things into perspective this week. I typically dread the end of vacation because that means I am back at home without help throughout the day and I do not get to have as much time to myself. I feel selfish for wanting so much time to myself, but that's where I'm at. The Lord has given me an extra measure of His patience and grace as AJ is bed training and having a difficult time harnessing the freedom during her only nap of the day. E has developed preferences for food and has not been eating as well as she was before; also, she is still using the bottle as a pacifier and takes 2 per day.

As much as I feel like she could probably go down to 1, I'm having trouble letting it go because the 1st is in the afternoon and I think it helps her sleep even though AJ delays that nap. Also, I am putting off potty training because I simply don't want to deal with it. I am being real, here. I know it has to happen, but I will likely wait until after Thanksgiving so PJ can help for her first week.

All that to say, I am so grateful for the Lord's constant provision and faithfulness to help us through every milestone. Thank you all who have been praying for us, I know that has been a HUGE impact for us. We are so grateful for the church family and our families He has surrounded us with.

For the Grandparents

Dear Grandpa & Nonna and Lolo & Lola,

I want you to know how incredibly grateful PJ and I are to have you so close and so willing to love on our family. Thank you for dropping everything and spending time with the girls. AJ and E will never understand how valuable it is for them to have their grandparents so close and so ready to spend the day with them.

PJ and I do not know what we would have done these last few weeks without you! With me going to the hospital, needing to go to dental and other doctor appointments, having to run long errands that stretch through nap times... It would be so stressful without you. We have so many friends who are far from family or have to drive long distances from home to see their families/ We also have friends who have lost or are in the process of losing their parents and are facing the challenge of seeing their little ones grow without their grandparents in their lives.

I grew up with so much family, it's ridiculous. I never understood (and probably still don't truly comprehend) how immensely blessed I am to have known 4 grandparents - and even 1 great grandparent until I was 13. At 27, I still have 3 living grandparents and so have the opportunity to see my babies loved by 4 grandparents and 3 great grandparents!

Knowing what I am going through and understanding the stress I am experiencing in this season of motherhood, I am grateful for all of you and the difficulties you had to face in your season of rough parenting. Mom, you faced single motherhood for 14 years! Ryan and I were adults (for the most part) before you married again. Dad, we have had our disagreements and rough patches and seasons of growth in our relationship, but I am so grateful that the Lord brought you into our lives when he did. And you are such an amazing Grandpa! Daddy and Mama, you guys had a few siblings here in the states, but you were on your own! Your parents were in the Philippines and passed without having these opportunities to love on their grand babies like you are. Thank you for the many sacrifices you made for Baba, PJ and Pete.

I just want you all to know how much it means to us to see you enjoy your grandbabies and that you are so willing to drop your days off, vacation days, and weekend plans to help us with them. Besides expressing myself through this blog, and tearing up as I do it, there are not enough words nor is there enough money in the world to compensate for the amount that we appreciate and love you for your support and encouragement as we tackle this parenting thing.

We love you guys!

This Year at Work

I wanted to take the time to share (brag about) my husband's success. I am so proud of PJ for all the work he has accomplished at the pharmacy this past year. He has completely turned his store around from having an "underperforming" status to being among the top in his district and his "area," which includes, I believe, all or most of Southern California.

A few months ago, his supervisor asked him to share his success on a monitored panel for other District Managers in the area so they may take away from his experience in improving customer service and other numbers for their own stores. When that went well, he was invited to speak at a national conference in Boston. My husband was recognized by his company on a national level! I did share about that already, but to update, he made it out there and back and it went wonderfully well!

He had made his first hire last summer, but after her training, she has only been at his store for 3 months now. Unfortunately, it has been a difficult adjustment. I am praying for a turn around, but it has been stressful for his whole store, with staff being effected in their motivation and performance.

Please be in prayer for PJ as the Lord guides him through this time at work and in approaching the situation among his colleagues. Praise God, I have been able to not only encourage hubby in his work, but also help him through a few stressful situations this past week. We are so grateful for the Lord's faithfulness as I have been growing and being gracious in late evenings and making the most of my time at home instead of sulking in waiting for PJ to get home.

Life's Encouragements

About a month ago, PJ told me that his district manager wanted him to recreate a panel discussion regarding his store's success at the national conference in Boston for Area Managers for the company. I really wish that my response was, "Oh my goodness, honey, that is amazing! I am so proud of you and the work you have accomplished at your store this last year!" To my shame, however, I responded with, "Well, how long will you be gone?" in a tone of contempt for his accomplishments. I felt the excitement drain from his demeanor and I knew there was no way I could take that moment back.

I was being completely and unreasonably selfish.

I wanted him to say he would bring ME with him. I wanted him to acknowledge how difficult his absence would be for ME. I wanted to feel as needed as I feel I need him.

It is not easy being a full time mommy and housewife. But I think that being a true helpmate and encouraging wife are even harder. As much as I give myself to my precious little girls each day, I have to give my full support and encouragement to my husband each day. That is a lot of work and takes a lot of investment. I want my husband to be successful and I desire him to do well. If I am aligning my life with his, which is what I am called to do, then I need to be more uplifting in my attitude.

Gee, this wife thing is tough, but I am so glad to have this opportunity to love and minister to my husband in this way.

Please pray for PJ as he heads off to Boston tomorrow. There is an ice storm warning in effect this weekend on the east coast and I pray his flight is not delayed or cancelled coming home. He will be flying out tomorrow morning, his meeting will be all day Thursday, and - Lord willing - he will be returning on Friday afternoon.

-Jessy

Welcome 2017!

It is becoming increasingly apparent that I am a selfish woman. I know, go figure, my humanity and pridefulness are real and life is tough. Life has been quite the adjustment since bringing home E and continuing to train up AJ.

What?! You mean that you're NOT Supermom and you DON'T have it all together?

That's right. I cannot keep the perfect schedule, have a hot breakfast on the table every morning, my husband's lunch ready the night before, be chipper and patient all day everyday, and geared up for a workout each morning.

Sometimes, I don't have the bottles ready when E wakes up from her nap. Most days, I'm not sure what AJ and I are having for lunch until after she has already signed several times that she is hungry and I'm still standing in front of the fridge looking for something decently nutritious for her which is filling enough for me. A majority of the time, I don't even remember what was on the menu for dinner and I'm looking for something to throw together when PJ calls me on his way home asking me what we're having, because the menu item was supposed to be put in the crockpot several hours before or the oven should have been preheated 20 minutes prior to said call.

All in all, it would seem (in my own, control freak, OCD brain) that a windstorm blew through our house. The elf of disorganization might have taken up residence in our bookshelves. The goblin of "what was the plan again?" is the chef who took over my kitchen. "Was I supposed to scrub that?" has camped out in the bathroom. The rainbow unicorn of magical disasters has visited AJ's room several times this week. I am not sure that I can keep up with all of these mystical creatures, they have powerful enchantments.

Alright, so I know that I am being ridiculous, also, Pinterest and Instagram are not the guidelines for everyday life... They are the ideals for homes with inactive children. I am proud to say that 4 of the last 5 days, my girls and I have walked at the mall, 3 of those included stretching and conditioning workouts. The Lord has provided yummy meals every night this week. Three nights this week have been filled with games and enjoyable company (PJ's parents and brother, my parents and brother, as well as friends from small group). Today was amazing because I was able to enjoy an afternoon with mom and some alone time at Starbucks journaling and doing Bible study while PJ enjoyed a "Daddy Day" with our littles.

Yesterday, when I thought my life was over because PJ forgot his schedule and I was denied my alone time; I enjoyed a relaxing day on the couch with the girls, bonded with them, taught AJ her ABC's (sounds and familiar words), extended tummy time with E, an incredibly encouraging article sent over my another mommy from small group, and a sorely needed discussion with friends about my struggle with discontentment.

We have filled this year with lots of goals and stated our desires for family growth, but I can already see that God is going to be stretching us a ton, encouraging us through many difficulties, and loving us right where we are.

Lord, thank you for revealing another incredible piece of your amazing grace. Thank you that I don't have to have it all put together and Your Spirit is my Help. Thank you for the desire to grow, communicate, and seek Your truth. Amen

We would covet your prayers, dear friends. That 2017 would bring our family:
Self-control, Patience and Kindness (all the Fruits of the Spirit) for Jessy
Good scheduling to OUTLINE (not DICTATE) our days
Speaking words for AJ
Walking and no allergies for E
Growth in leadership and strong management for PJ

Love,
Jessy
Numbers 6:24-26

This is a Tough One

I am 39 weeks pregnant.

It is hot, well, today it is still overcast at 10:40am, so I am grateful for that.
EE is heavy and resting quite low, I can feel her in my lower hips, and she doesn't have much room to move around.

I am extremely hormonal, emotionally labile, needy, and irritable. Everything makes me want to cry, and I am ready to meet this little one. I hate feeling this way and I hate asking for help everyday because I'm having trouble keeping up with my developing walker.

I am prayerful that the midwife will send me straight over to Labor & Delivery on Thursday morning, in the mean time, I am doing everything I can that is safe here at home to encourage my body to go into labor naturally.

I write this with tears because I know the Lord has blessed me and given me so much grace through this pregnancy. I have been able to keep exercising, I have been eating better than when I was pregnant with AJ, and I have been able to spend more time managing our home and reading godly insight instead of giving into many lazy temptations.

I am grateful to be home with AJ to teach and train her. I am so proud of how well she is doing with her schedule and of her independent spirit. She is 11 months old now and she enjoys playing in her room for large chunks of time; has moved up to the toddler room at church early, as it has aided her separation anxiety; she sleeps 10-12 hours at night, waking up at 6:15 each morning; she loves food and will try most new things with a pleasant response, but is not shy about letting us know her preferences; she drinks her milk and water from a straw cup like the big girl she is; and we are so blessed beyond measure that she is our daughter. We cannot wait to see her love on her little sister.

Please pray for us as we continue to await the arrival of our little girl. That we would be prepared and grateful for this time we have. That I would not be anxious or push myself beyond measure for my preferences and desires when we bring her home. For a safe delivery and short hospital stay. For my parents as they take time from work to take care of AJ while we are in the hospital. That AJ would not be overwhelmed, and the transition will not be too difficult for her. Also, for PJ, that he is able to prepare his store well before he goes on leave starting this Thursday.

Thank you, friends and family, for your prayers and support. We would not be able to do this without knowing we had such an incredible community around us!

One Month Old

                                      

AJ turned 1 month yesterday! What a roller coaster it has been. PJ has been back at work for a week and a half now and it has been somewhat of a tough transition, but we are hanging in there.

When I refer to the roller coaster, I am mainly talking about my emotional state. I never realized how difficult being a mommy was going to be. Nothing comes naturally- feeding, sleeping, schedules, feeding patterns- nothing. 

I'll start off with the fact that I was not (and still have not been able to) produce enough milk to feed or keep up with her. It was really difficult to talk about and there is still some fear and anxiety about the fact that I have to suppliment and bottle feed her. She will not nurse and the screams she cries out when we try do not help my body's stress. (*Please note: I love and appreciate you for wanting to know how we are doing, but please do not advise me in this regard, I have spoken to lots of friends and family who have or are currently experiencing these decisions, and we have already made ours). 

We started to get a somewhat consistent "routine" down and then she began her 3 week growth spurt, so everything was thrown off. When the spurt was over, she decided that she liked the shorted periods between feedings, so she took advantage of the suring the day. I can't complain too much about her sleeping, though, because she does AMAZING in the car/out and about. She also goes for long stretches at night, so PJ and I are both doing well with the amount that we sleep.

We have had our ups and downs, but I cannot say that we are without tons of love and support! I have had a few diffiult days where I don't seem to be myself, even when we're out with friends. Yet, the Lord has been faithful to remind me how much of an incredible blessing my family is. AJ is healthy, we have not had to deal with medical issues, hospital stays, medications, or any other complications. She is a good sleeper, she can't (as a newborn) sleep through the night, but she sleeps well enough to give hubby and I the sleep we need to get through the day and she rests prety well in the morning; this ideally would be a good time for me to do my Bible study and catch up on my chores.

PJ and I have a beutiful, healthy baby girl. We have a huge support around us to give us date nights and encurage us in this new adventure. We really cannot complain about this stage of life we are in. We can only pray and ask God to grant us the patience we need as new parents and the discipline we need to be intentional with our time. 

                                     

Thank you for your love, encouragement and prayers! We would not be able to do this without you!